July 18, 2008

Just say "yes"!

You know this trick men have to pacify their wives, just nod every few minutes and say a few agreeable words like "Hmm...yes", "I can understand", "Makes sense"? Well sometimes, I think that works best for the man and the wife. Especially during pregnancy. The other day I was asking k if he knew what the most annoying question is that people ask me? He came up with a few vague answers and in general was clueless, which is not a big surprise. But anyway, one of the most annoying questions for me is, "Have you been walking/exercising regularly? Or..."

Or what? Or have I been sitting on my fat behind, perching my oh-so-light 25 pounds extra on the sofa and watching the 5th rerun of Still Standing or Rachael Ray's summer treats?

Or have I been lying on bed all day calling k on the cell to ask for some light snacks to be brought up to the bed room?

Actually if you think about it, it's an innocent question by itself but somehow it always rubs me the wrong way. Maybe it's the weird hormonal imbalance in me that manipulates the question in my head so I process it all wrong. Each time!

In my head, I come up with a fitting response each time though I just nod each time and say nothing, for example:

"Oh nooo! My nurse says walking might result in preterm glycomalampsiacal abberrations!"

"Nooo, I am waiting for you to gain 20-30 pounds extra and join me for walking, that way we can both enjoy how light and breezy we both feel about the walk, so shall we say, next Tuesday?"

"No, I haven't been walking. I prefer not to move much from my bed so I can stay relaxed all day long. Of course my company understands and so does my husband. In fact, the other day my company sent me flowers that my husband arranged in a pretty vase next to my bed so I can smell it without getting out of bed..."

Or I could go with the really simple, "No. I don't believe in walking" response.

Anyhow, coming back to the topic, sometimes the least stressful thing for a woman to hear during her pregnancy is just a yes. Not a detailed logical response explaining why her idea won't work, not a sorta-yes-sorta-no head shake, just a bright, agreeable "Yes!".

"Can we go on a cruise with our one week old baby so we can both recover?"

"Yes, of course dear!"

"Let's plan the India trip that we will make in 2015 so I can make sure we are all set..."

"Yes, I agree. Let's do that!"

"I want tea at 8.30 in the night 15 minutes before dinner."

"Of course, good idea, I'll make some for myself too!"

"Will the baby be born with 6 fingers?"

"Yes..." Well, it doesn't always work but 3 out of 4 ain't bad!

See, what I mean? There is an RSS (Really Simple Solution) to every problem on earth. And if men were to ask me the one thing they could do to ensure a stress-free la-dee-dah pregnancy for their wives, I would say, "Yes. Just say yes!".

Reminds me of this movie in which Rajnikanth will keep saying "Yesssss, yessss" without understanding what the other person says in English :)


Anonymous said...

A welcome advice. But i believe it has to be this way every time; not just during the pregnancies. A guaranteed peaceful life ever :)

Parth said...

Does it help if women already know that the 'trick' is being enforced?

Red Phoenix said...

I just googled for the word glycomalampsiacal and ended up seeing ur blog post again.... Plz enlighten me with the meaning behind it...
Here's something interesting goin to happen in a few years down the road to u.
All my nephew talked three months ago was 'Yes'
Can you say yes? Yes
Can you say no? Yes
Then say No... Yes
Oh God... NooooooooooOOOO, YessssSSS

RS said...

elatedamit - :p :)

parth - Strangely, it works unless you go out of your way to make it explicit like "Ok, am just going to nod to get you to stop asking!" :p

red phoenix - Did you really think a syndrome like that existed? :p

GG said...

I don't think pregnancy has anything to do with that feeling - it's just the XY chromosomal combination that triggers such expectations at times!
Just say yes dammit :p

kamal said...

the cool part is I can say yes in multiple languages, so I do not become monotonous for my wife.

Yes, Haan, Seri,Barabar, Accha .. etc etc.. :p .. and of course use all the variations of yes in all languages, gives a perception that I am giving a different answer each time

Chris Rock: Keeping in Real, Real Dumb

Jira said...

I wish husbands learn to say 'yes' most of the times (well always):)

I happened to stumble upon your blog and it made for an interesting read...the posts have a sense of 'realness' about them..a nice personal blog!

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