November 05, 2010

Happy Deepavali!

It's that time of the year again. For the past 10 years, deepavali for me usually means:

1. Emails/chats and more recently Facebook status updates about how everyone here is missing Deepavali in India -- the TV programmes, firecrackers, sweets, people...why did waking up early then seem like a difficult thing to do? Isn't not waking up or being woken up on Deepavali an infinitely more difficult feeling to experience?

2. Less than 50°F outside (This year, it's even colder -- it's 39°F outside) -- can't head out without layers...can still recall the cool, misty dawns of those days when the men folk would head out to burst the big crackers while I stayed behind happy with my fire sparklers, no Lakshmi vedi for me!

3. ISD calls from India and to India wishing each other a happy Deepavali...tinny voices over a wire attempting to share a significant moment of togetherness over miles and miles of distance...

4. Waiting for the work day to end so one can at least celebrate Deepavali the few precious free hours one gets after 5 PM -- How is it that Deepavali always falls on a work day?

5. Or in more recent work-from home-times, staring at my screen, willing the bugs away, sitting in my PJs on the couch with Jaya TV on mute -- wondering about warmer times and distant places...

6. Hurriedly dressing up and heading to the temple in the evening so at least one little bit of the day's tradition is intact -- Happy Deepavali God, stay warm!

7. (And finally)Weekend celebrations -- A get-together after Deepavali to talk about simpler times and a younger us...

Happy Deepavali to you all. May the day and the years ahead be filled with happy moments and togetherness!

November 03, 2010

Living in the head of a 2 year old.

Sometimes I wonder what goes on in r's head when she makes specific (and quite unreasonable) demands and expects to take them to completion. The other day, she insisted on wearing 2 pairs of socks inside the house and roaming about in them. She slipped a couple of times on the floor but still wanted to wear them. Yesterday in the mall, she wouldn't remove the gloves and hat I had put on her to check the size. Finally, I had to get another pair and scan that one to buy it! I trust the written word :p and usually take to  books to find answers to my questions (the non google type of questions which involve more thought than the shortest route to a park) but parenting is an ongoing lesson that I have picked up on more through practical experience than through books. Nope, doesn't mean I'll stop reading my parenting books. I will continue to do so, so I can at least pretend while I read that I am going to be an ideal parent but somewhere in the corner of my mind, I'll know that r already has a trick to get past my latest parenting tool!

No transition is easy and now we are trying out preschool for her (couple of hours one day a week) and she has her own thoughts about it and so far this is what I have gleaned out of her head: that she wants an exciting world full of colors and shapes and people, most importantly kids but she also wants her mom or dad to stand in the corner and watch so she can run to them when she feels uncertain. If only I could create such a world for her! I can tell she is getting a bit bored at home, even with a nanny, that her toys don't interest her as much. She still likes her books but a 2 year old can not read throughout the day! But in the outside world, she wants her mom or dad to stand guard for her and I don't blame her -- it's a scary world out there. So, she is trying to find her balance while we try to find ours with work and home.

My next book is How to Talk So Kids Will Listen & Listen So Kids Will Talk Let's see if I can get something useful out of it!
© Ramya Sethuraman, All Rights Reserved.